If You Had Loved Me

if you had loved me
i would have raised you

a bridge over the shifting red dunes of my soul
on spider silk threads
beading with nectar
to nourish you forever

taken you on a journey
to the dark side of the moon
a freeze-dried embryo
lays buried there
not dead
but waiting
to belong

if you had loved me
truly
you needn’t have shown it
not in glaring devotionals
or the passion of flesh
not in compassion or forgiveness
you needn’t have shown it at all
(even originals can be copies
even reality can be faked
even i am not who i thought i’d be)

had you loved me
there would be a heart in my breast

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